15 Apr 2026

Reasons To Not Have Bad Feelings About People

I try to have good relations with everyone. But somehow, every now and then I meet someone who gets the blood under my nails.

It's easy to let this person occupy my mind, and impact my emotions.

But it's useless, here are five things I learned from biographies.

Bloomberg's biography is very open and honest about his attitude after a colleague with whom he had a long and bitter feud died in a plane accident. It are these nuggets why I like to read biographies.

"Rosenthal ... had been killed, crashing a new Beech Baron aircraft into a house on his approach to Westchester Airport.

Was I happy, or sad? After all the years of bitter fighting, I guess I'm ashamed to say that the right word was ambivalent."

Why is it important not to hate someone? Because frustration occupies your mind, while you want your mind to be occupied with constructive ideas. That comes from another smart person, Paul Graham:

"My wife thinks I'm more forgiving than she is, but my motives are purely selfish."

If you let frustration occupy your mind, there is no space for the important things you're working on.

I heard on a podcast that feeling constrained and having negative thoughts lowers your IQ. They can say a lot of things on podcasts, but I like to believe it's true, because in a foul mood I am generally way less creative and productive.

Robbins asks us to realise how cheap it is if you let your happiness be defined by someone else, then they win.

If you get angry, the other party always wins anyway.

Finally, Richard Branson has a quote in one of his books or public videos that every time he said something bad, his mother would put him in front of the mirror and tell him it was on him it would reflect badly, not the other person.

Don't hate, don't frustrate, focus on opportunities, ideas and possibilities.

Sources:

Learned with ❤️ from The App Brewery